I never give up…

Hello peeps, if there’s anybody still around… or if anybody stops by and realizes that there was a long, long time since I last posted and that my last few posts were all about my struggle to find out the reasons why I didn’t seem to be able to lose weight… Just in case anybody wondered what happened to the lady who was looking for the thin-lady-inside of her… I am still here… I just want you to know that no matter what… no matter the struggles… I just DON’T GIVE UP! That’s right! … And while my weight kept slowly (and sometimes not so slowly) but surely creeping up… I never quit my battle against obesity… and while I did reach the 200’s again I didn’t gain all my weight back….

My last resort has been to invest in an expensive gym membership (which included 5 sessions with a fitness trainer and some blood work)

The blood work said what I already knew… Everything looks amazing in paper! They can tell I eat healthy and I exercise because the glucose is spot on, ideal numbers for triglycerides, HDL cholesterol, LDL cholesterol, blood pressure EVERYTHING! … They did a cardio test and they also were able to prove that I wasn’t lying when I said I exercise every day! They got me on the elliptical and it did nothing! High resistance and incline and I was feeling like I was sitting on a couch! My hear rate was so stable and not spiking… I could talk through the whole test… it was… GREAT! The trainer said: Wow, you really are strong… and I even told him when everything was done: “Sorry, I just have to ask… am I the healthiest fat person you’ve ever helped?” I could tell he was afraid to answer … Poor guy! but he finally said: “I am going to have to say yes to that!” LOL… So he started explaining to me that my body had just simply adapted to EVERYTHING I DO… Yes… everything! Including the 10 mile walks, the eating healthy, everything! And when the discouragement came and I did eat out of my normal, healthy stuff… of course I saw even an increase… and that was doing it! So what am I doing now?

  1. Weight Lifting… I had never tried that and the trainer highly recommended it (plus I’ve always had the goal of looking somewhat like a bodybuilder… I know… it might seem crazy… but I really reach for that!)
  2. Switching things around more both with the food and the exercise… in regards to food I am sticking to strictly healthy stuff, avoiding grains but not excluding them, continuing to live a “sugar free lifestyle”, and sticking to what I already used to do of no artificial junk and stuff like that… BUT now I am just making sure that I am not always “eating the same” everyday… adding more fish to my diet and like my trainer said: “When things stop working, change things up a bit”
  3. I am not focusing on the scale…. After 2 weeks of all the training and sticking to my healthy food… I felt stronger yet the scale said I had lost only 2 pounds (what!? I am still walking 10 miles, plus 1 hour of cardio and 1 hour of weights! How can that be?) well… looking deeper into it… and with the right equipment… ALL THE OTHER NUMBERS told a more encouraging story… I had lost 7.5 pounds of fat during those 2 weeks… yet gained 4.5 pounds of lean mass… AMAZING! Had I not known those details I know I would’ve let the 2 pounds be very discouraging! All that work for NOTHING??? BUT …. Now I know I have to REALLY trust other things more than the number on the scale… How do I feel? Am I getting stronger? How do the clothes feel? Etc… and I can’t let the scale ruin all those other tangible victories!
  4. Resting… With this I am still struggling… I have to trust what the trainer said about letting my body rest… I get this weird anxiety if I relax… I feel like I can’t sit or not train for a day because I will get huge… like… on that day! and this takes me to the next point…
  5. Training my mind as well… I am learning a lot about neuroplasticity… which is basically how our thinking affects our brains and our bodies… it might sound like it’s not something serious but being healthy involves our minds too… I have to change the way I think about myself… and even quit the negative thoughts that tell me “I’ll never get to accomplish something” and learn to relax, enjoy and not obsess.

strong

So … there you see me in the blurry picture above… I have those bands in my legs, I walk sideways with those and it is a great strength exercise for my legs (hips and thighs I think) … I am having a lot of fun and loving seeing results in my body… Hopefully my experience encourages you! I never quit… I just don’t… Find what works for you! I hope I can give you a great update soon!

The Thin Lady Inside

I can’t believe it’s been so long…

Hello everybody! I am back and everything seems to have changed on my wordpress dashboard! I apologize for taking so long to write an update or to do some “blog-hopping” it’s just been really busy here… just little things like our rent going up, not being able to buy a house just yet and me trying to find some online jobs to do… like … translating jobs or something… I spend my days looking for coupons and/or jobs … I know I am good at translating (not just good… I’m pretty awesome 😀 ) but all the sites to do jobs (like odesk.com) they are obviously open to the world and there are other freelancers in other countries that are willing to do “the job” almost for free… and it’s just not worth it for me… so… the coupons are more like it I guess… I want to feel like I contribute somehow but we have it very clear that I want to stay home with my little ones… so… that’s part of what’s been going on here… I continue to do whatever I do to watch my weight… I watch it… a lot… I watch it go up a little and then down a little… I had to quit FMD because it was too expensive to do everything organic… and I felt like I was eating our whole refrigerator with all the vegetable and fruits I had to eat … so… back to Trim Healthy Mama and hoping that the FMD (Fast Metabolism Diet) helped me a little to get my metabolism going and hopefully see results on THM…. I continue running every morning and that’s about it… Just wanted togive a quick update as to why I haven’t been around… and also wanted to share this picture that a friend shared on fb… I thought it was really cute… so I am sharing but I am not claiming any kind of rights whatsoever over it… it’s not mine… I am not sure who is the original owner, if you know the source please let me know so I can give proper credit where it’s due…

fatI’ll be around…

The Thin Lady Inside

It is happening!

Hello everybody! How are you doing? I am thrilled to announce that struggling and all I’ve lost 10 pounds since I went and visited that horrible Natural Health Center in April…. I remember that as “the date” because it was a very low point in my journey… you can read about it here … If you’ve been following my blog then you know I started at 222.8  pounds (2 and a half years ago)… reached172.8 (50 pounds less) after a few months and then I didn’t seem to be able to go any lower… then it turns out I gained a lot of weight for what seems hormones/stress issues (December 2013) and then in April this year I found out I was 194 pounds!! horrible! I gained 22 pounds back! but Friday I weighed myself and even when I haven’t seen my weight go “dramatically down” I saw the number and it was 184 and that’s when it actually hit me! Yes… I am still heavier than what I had already reached… BUT… I HAVE LOST 10 POUNDS in about 5-6 weeks which is pretty good!!! Yes I’ve struggled but I am just happy to see some changes! I continue to not weigh everyday and I am happy I am at peace with it but it for sure was a nice surprise to see that!

I continue to do great and I am back to running in the mornings (just not as early and just making sure I eat something -a snack- before I run) … It’s harder to run but my friend and I are doing it and we’re planning on doing another 5k in September… today we went for 3.45 miles but ran only 1.3 miles out of those… Feeling good though!

Saturday I walked/ran in the morning and then it was an active day picking blueberries with my family… it’s been quite active around here in the pool and doing fun activities like that… I am sure that also helps reduce any stress/cortisol levels and in consequence aids my weight loss! Yeah! WIN/WIN!

Have a great week everyone!

The Thin Lady Inside

Day 1 of many, many, many!

Hello everybody! Here I am … so … as you know (if you’ve read my previous posts) I decided to give the Fast Metabolism Diet by Haylie Pomroy a try! The Fast Metabolism Diet, as I probably already explained before, is a plan that consists of 3 phases that you have to repeat until you complete 28 days to heal your metabolism and in consequence reach your desired weight goal… of course if your metabolism is more damaged and/or have way more weight to lose then you just “rinse and repeat” pretty much… so you do the plan again for 28 more days and again and again if necessary…. So… having 28 days to go through was cool… you know? I like to set goals for myself, etc… But I guess I have other issues to deal with (like sabotaging myself and fear of success) … day 25 proved harder than I thought… being so close to day 28 added extra stress for me and it seemed (for some reason) unbearable! it was such a weird feeling “being so close” to the end of the 28 days made me feel so anxious and made it feel too far!!! Phase 2 is the hardest of the 3 phases and for me Phase 2 is always on Wednesdays and Thursdays … so … that Thursday I decided to just skip Phase 2 and move on to Phase 3 … So I pretty much didn’t finish strong, as Phases shouldn’t be skipped at all! I still lost 4 pounds on my 28 days which is not a lot by any sense of the imagination, especially on this plan where most people seem to just LITERALLY DROP the pounds right away! But for me is a huge accomplishment since the scale has been really mean to me for a long time no matter what I did… losing 4 pounds definitely means a lot and is a first step on the right direction… So… I decided to continue with the FMD until I reach my weight goals BUT this time I decided to forget about the “28 day” thing and just know that this is going to be a loooooong journey which I will only be able to go through ONE DAY AT A TIME…. So… I ripped my calendar and it feels good to not have a “set date” (for me) … I guess it’s all about finding out what works for yourself and having a specific date, for me, was too much pressure and added feelings of failure and disappointment to reach a date where I was supposed to lose up to 20 pounds and made my accomplishment look like “nothing”…

So… on other news and with a new found sense of accomplishment… I have decided to give myself some credit… Today I celebrate that “I am HERE!” 🙂 Many would’ve given up by now… and I’ve decided to celebrate the fact that I am not where I started 2 1/2 years ago! I’ve had bumps (big ones) on this road, I’ve shed pounds and I’ve shed tears (mostly tears than pounds) but I haven’t quit! I am still lighter than when I started… and still fighting…  I haven’t lost all hope and I know there’s no going back to “not caring” 🙂 I CARE! 😀

So… yes… 🙂 Lots to feel proud of 😀

The Thin Lady Inside

Day 17

Hello everybody!  Today is day 17 of the 28 days of the Fast Metabolism Diet… as I have already mentioned, this diet is supposed to heal your metabolism in 28 days but, every metabolism is different and some have more weight to lose than others so if you haven’t lost all the weight you need to lose in these 28 days you just repeat the whole thing all over again (and as many times as necessary), after that period of time then you can choose to incorporate some ingredients that are not allowed during this process or you can choose that you enjoyed the “feeling of good health” so much that you just “leave them out” … now… if you choose to incorporate some ingredients (like I will, in the case of dairy) the recommendation is to choose the organic kind and to avoid “overdoing” it… so… I will follow those recommendations for sure!

So… my first week on this diet I lost 2 pounds… YAY! … I was all impatient so I weighed myself again before week 2 ended… and I lost 2 more pounds (YAY!!!) so… 4 pounds lost, right? Awesomeness… Then… by the end of week 2 I weighed myself again and it turns out I gained 1.3 pounds so I thought “huh” but didn’t think more of it because I know it’s not that much to even think it’s real weight, it might just be liquid or whatever, right? well… I am midway week 3 and I actually saw the measuring tape move a little bit but not to the right side so I weighed myself and I gained 1.5 more pounds… interesting… So you could say that I have only lost 1.2 pounds total -sigh-… and that’s if the scale doesn’t keep going up…

Anyway… I know I should throw the stupid scale away especially if it is going to affect me… I still trust this method so I am choosing not to care too much about it… some other people in the group have reported weight gain on week 2 as well so I guess I’m not the only one… I am still hopeful about all of this but maybe the fact that I am on P2 (Phase 2) doesn’t help (phase 2 are Wednesdays and Thursdays where the diet gets really hard! but Friday, Saturday and Sunday are amazing so I keep telling myself that it’s just TWO DAYS! JUST TWO DAYS!)

So… I just wanted to give you all an update on how I am doing… I have been doing this to the “T” so I hope it will eventually pay off!

The Thin Lady Inside

Because she believes me!

Hello everybody, here I am … today is day 9 of the Fast Metabolism Diet 28 day plan! This plan is supposed to heal your metabolism in about 28 days, some people have a slower metabolism than others, some have more or less weight to lose than others… so if by day 28 you’re “not done” you just start all over again… People have asked me “what made me try the Fast Metabolism Diet” and I always say “she believes me” … Allow me to explain: when I heard about this plan I thought I wouldn’t be able to do it because NO DAIRY is allowed… at all… no yogurt, butter, milk (except for rice/almond/coconut milks), kefir, sour cream, cheese, nothing! and I thought I for sure would never even try something that would separate me and dairy! Nothing could ever come between us! NOTHING! but… as I continued to read the book I found something that Haily Pomroy (author of the FMD) said that touched the very depths of my soul … she said: “I believe you!” … She says in her book that some of her customers come to her tired of dieting, skeptic to try something “new” or “opposing what they’ve learned in other diets” etc… and they tell her in frustration how they have REALLY ADHERED to other strict eating plans without any good results… and she says that she believes them … and then she talked to me, the reader, and said: “I believe you! I believe that you have done it, I believe that you have counted calories, I believe that you have only eaten protein or carbs, or whatever the diets required of you” (paraphrasing) I BELIEVE YOU! And it’s been so long since I last felt someone “believed me” … even when trying THM (Trim Healthy Mama, which I love) when I would come up to the wonderful groups where everyone is really, sincerely supportive and nice… I found that people would say “well, maybe you’re not doing this or that, well, maybe you are doing something wrong, maybe you’re eating too much of something, etc” … when I would go to doctors when I was eating low calories and exercising a lot they looked at me and smiled in disbelief and said “well eat less and exercise more!” … and for the first time… I found someone who said… “I believe you!” … Haylie doesn’t know me… personally (obviously) … but she knows I (and many others like me) exist! and she knows I (we) have really tried! she believes it… but there’s something else why diets don’t work even when test results come back from the doctor’s office saying that everything is “apparently normal” … So… because she believed me… I believe her! And I will do this as well… with everything I have! Sometimes I have doubts while doing this program… but I mostly doubt myself… Am I eating too much? And I go back to my meal maps that she put together… and I trust it and “Let it go” …. I weighed myself yesterday and I lost 2 pounds on my first week.. it’s not a lot but I am not stressing out… I am truly letting go and doing this thing! Hopefully my metabolism will get it!

The Thin (and hopeful) Lady Inside