Day 1 of many, many, many!

Hello everybody! Here I am … so … as you know (if you’ve read my previous posts) I decided to give the Fast Metabolism Diet by Haylie Pomroy a try! The Fast Metabolism Diet, as I probably already explained before, is a plan that consists of 3 phases that you have to repeat until you complete 28 days to heal your metabolism and in consequence reach your desired weight goal… of course if your metabolism is more damaged and/or have way more weight to lose then you just “rinse and repeat” pretty much… so you do the plan again for 28 more days and again and again if necessary…. So… having 28 days to go through was cool… you know? I like to set goals for myself, etc… But I guess I have other issues to deal with (like sabotaging myself and fear of success) … day 25 proved harder than I thought… being so close to day 28 added extra stress for me and it seemed (for some reason) unbearable! it was such a weird feeling “being so close” to the end of the 28 days made me feel so anxious and made it feel too far!!! Phase 2 is the hardest of the 3 phases and for me Phase 2 is always on Wednesdays and Thursdays … so … that Thursday I decided to just skip Phase 2 and move on to Phase 3 … So I pretty much didn’t finish strong, as Phases shouldn’t be skipped at all! I still lost 4 pounds on my 28 days which is not a lot by any sense of the imagination, especially on this plan where most people seem to just LITERALLY DROP the pounds right away! But for me is a huge accomplishment since the scale has been really mean to me for a long time no matter what I did… losing 4 pounds definitely means a lot and is a first step on the right direction… So… I decided to continue with the FMD until I reach my weight goals BUT this time I decided to forget about the “28 day” thing and just know that this is going to be a loooooong journey which I will only be able to go through ONE DAY AT A TIME…. So… I ripped my calendar and it feels good to not have a “set date” (for me) … I guess it’s all about finding out what works for yourself and having a specific date, for me, was too much pressure and added feelings of failure and disappointment to reach a date where I was supposed to lose up to 20 pounds and made my accomplishment look like “nothing”…

So… on other news and with a new found sense of accomplishment… I have decided to give myself some credit… Today I celebrate that “I am HERE!” 🙂 Many would’ve given up by now… and I’ve decided to celebrate the fact that I am not where I started 2 1/2 years ago! I’ve had bumps (big ones) on this road, I’ve shed pounds and I’ve shed tears (mostly tears than pounds) but I haven’t quit! I am still lighter than when I started… and still fighting…  I haven’t lost all hope and I know there’s no going back to “not caring” 🙂 I CARE! 😀

So… yes… 🙂 Lots to feel proud of 😀

The Thin Lady Inside

Tears of joy!

That’s what I experienced when I crossed the finish line of my very first 5k! Not that I ran super fast or anything but I didn’t quit and ran the whole thing… There were times when I felt like “walking” only but I knew I wouldn’t “forgive me” later… I am so thankful to have a great friend IRL that runs with me and supports and encourages just like my followers/readers/online friends (including you Tiff!!!) when I was about to give up I kept thinking about all the people “cheering for me” … whether they were there or not… just all those that would be happy for me… and just about myself being able to “conquer” my body and make it submit! so… when I was about to finish I didn’t think much of what I would feel… I wasn’t expecting anything special… but then… right when I stepped on the finish line an overwhelming joy hit me right on my chest! and I felt tears flood my eyes! I didn’t really cry or anything, I stayed composed… after all… nobody else was making “that big of a deal” about it… after all, many crossed the line before I did, after all I wasn’t even being timed -snort- but still… the joy to see myself crossing a “finish line” for the very first time in any kind of “race/run” was just too big, too deep, too good! and I enjoyed seeing my husband and my daughters waiting for me in such excitement as well and with such pride that I will keep all those feelings forever!

I just wanted to share with all of you! … and to say “Thank you” to those who believe in me! Whether you comment or not… I just Thank you!

Before the race, with my running friend!

Before the race, with my running friend!

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Can you see Me? The word “Me” is right on top of … well… obviously… Me!

Right after crossing the finish line!

Right after crossing the finish line!

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Together after our run!

The Thin Lady Inside

Extremely Proud…

Hello, it’s me again, I’ve been posting probably a little too often but I had to share! I just came back from a Christmas celebration from my “LifeGroup” at church and… I didn’t eat A THING! … I had dinner before going there and I took with me my little packet of hot cocoa mix and a 90 calorie Fiber One Brownie… I enjoyed both but didn’t touch a thing of the amazingly tempting spread that had been laid before us! There was so much stuff! Including a delicious, very delicious cheesy potato casserole that I made… but I had none of it! This makes me feel invincible! If I could do this in the “most impossible moment”  when won’t I be able to do it? YKWIM? I hope I go to this feeling of victory and accomplishment when I hit a bump on the road… ’cause I know we have peaks and lows! Ah! Making happy dance!

The Thin Lady Inside