Ok… so yesterday wasn’t a good day, emotionally… first I started my day by stepping on a scale that refuses to show any lower numbers… I thought that was bad and I cried… then I went to Bible Study but I am proud to say that I didn’t touch any of their breakfast! I made a point to wake up earlier and have my own breakfast here at home, I skipped my coffee and had coffee (just coffee) at church… it was nice!
But then… one of the members of the next Mission Trip to India asked us for prayer for a horrible situation that is going on over there… this lady (and many others) go directly to the brothels to pray and try to help in any way they can the ladies that are there, many times because they don’t seem to have a choice, other times because they were sold, and they’re having babies there, in that environment, etc… One of the ladies was rescued from the brothel community and taken to a shelter but the brothel owner stole her baby… and is not giving the baby back… they know for a fact that this baby is being abused… so they’re asking for prayer and for a miracle so something happens…. when they said this… I had to leave the room, I wasn’t ready to hear such horrible things, I wanted to leave the whole thing, grab my girls and come back to my bubble (my home) where I hide most of the time! I was thinking about this in another room, just sobbing and crying in a way I thought I needed to scream! There was pain in my stomach to think of this poor baby (and so many others! sadly!) that is not with his mom and if they’re abusing him you think someone is caring to change his diapers? To feed him? it breaks my heart and made me feel ashamed of my sadness for my “scale issues” that was definitely no reason to get so “worked up”…all these people from church are going back, trying to hopefully do something… but they know it will be hard… I just hope I’ll be hearing some good report soon because I can’t shake these horrible thoughts off! And I cry as I type this…
The world keeps spinning and my life continues, I am a mom and a wife and I have responsibilities here… I still must take care of my health even if being overweight seems like “is not a problem” in comparison… but if I want to do anything at all in this world I must take care of my health and exemplify it to my girls too! I was a little afraid such emotional things would make me eat more and I was tempted indeed… all day long I had a knot in my stomach/chest/throat that I felt could be loosened if I just ate something delicious and high in calories… and lots of it! But I didn’t… so here are my numbers:
I ate 1421 calories
I exercised on the wii and burned 285 calories …
That’s it for now… if you pray…. please include this in your prayers… Thank you!
The Thin Lady Inside