Today … today I’ve come to the realization that I am definitely STUCK in this weird 203-204 weight! It is hard to admit it! But I’ve been saying hi and bye to 205 for 2 weeks now! it is not a good feeling! and it’s been disappointing to see those numbers day after day, sometimes even increasing a little bit… I’ve been keeping my calories down and exercising regularly and still… after losing so much weight the first 3 or 4 weeks I am STUCK HERE! So… in the past, when I’ve been in this same situation I’ve indulged… and even when I gain a little bit of weight after my “indulging” it seems to “get me out of my plateau and then things start moving along much easier… Today I ate more for lunch… I actually had mac’n’cheese, cauliflower soup (it has butter and cream in it) and a sandwich… I liked it, of course but I am scared… LOL! I don’t want to see the scale go up even if a little bit… even if I know it’s with a purpose but I didn’t see any other option… I know I CAN’T drink more water! I’m drinking A LOT ALREADY! I know I can’t do more in the gym just yet, I only have ONE HOUR and trust me! I am PUSHING MYSELF there! … I can’t eat less calories… not now… I am already low I think… and I even wonder if that’s my issue right now… So I ate… I ate what I wanted for lunch! I hadn’t planned on it this morning but then it hit me… I think it was the right thing to do (I hope so!!!) but as soon as I was done…. I stopped myself and you know? I am back on track! drinking my water and I’ll just have my super low calorie smoothie tonight (besides going to the gym) I hope this works! I am tired of being stuck here! I want to see CHANGE! Even if just MINIMUM change but I want to feel that all my working out and everything I am doing is paying off! It’s not like I am expecting to lose it all in 2 months but … you know what I am saying right? I should be seeing some consistent change even if just “an ounce of change” every day/week/month so here I am … terrified of the scale tomorrow but hopeful this will work as it has worked in the past!
The Thin Lady Inside