Home » Uncategorized » BINGING!!

BINGING!!

Oh! I have been feeling like binging today! I am happy I have this journal because it helps me vent and stay accountable… for some reason it makes me just think twice before doing anything… it is making me very aware of the decisions I make throughout the day… so… all of a sudden I had this “hunger/anxiety attack” it usually happens when I know it will be a long day and I won’t see hubby, then the 3 yr. old acting up and the baby… well she is not walking yet but she gets very frustrated because she really wants to walk! so what she does is raise her hands so I pick her up! and if I don’t then she cries and cries until I do! and then when I pick her up… she doesn’t want me to hold her! So … well… I guess you get the idea… anyway… I think all those things just gather to form the “perfect storm” and I feel like…eating! Why not? right? I get a weird feeling that makes my hands almost shake! I need to eat something! And guess what I did? I ate! I ate! but I am very proud because I ate a BIG SALAD! (just green leaves, some fresh cheese and 1 tbsp. of low calorie italian dressing)

I thought: “You want to binge? THEN BINGE! but why do you have to choose the worst thing in the refrigerator/pantry!? if you want to binge choose something nutritious, something low in calories and something that will *buy some time* so you have the opportunity to think again about why you are eating and why you feel like this and hopefully STOP!” so I ate my salad with my shaky hands and thought about it! and felt better for not having “ruined my day” I sighed in relief for having been able to make a good decision regardless of the impulse of eating like it was my last meal! LOL! So… it worked! And I am happy! I know there will be bumps in the road but I want to be prepared for them… anyway… I just wanted to share about my struggles today…

The Thin Lady Inside

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s